Admit it–haven’t you wondered about this? What IS the effect of all that hair removal down there on the local flora and fauna? Fortunately, scientists have answered that question. Sort of. For women in Leeds, England. (Maybe.)
Armstrong, N. (2006). Did the “Brazilian” kill the pubic louse? Sexually Transmitted Infections, 82 (3), 265-266 DOI: 10.1136/sti.2005.018671
I’ve seen this paper cited over and over, but what you don’t realize until you actually read it is that….it doesn’t actually have any significant conclusions. The authors looked at the occurrence of chlamydia, gonorrhea, and pubic lice between 1997 and 2003 in people showing up at a public GYN clinic. While clap and chlamydia increased significantly, the frequency of pubic lice declined significantly during the same period.
The graph itself is deceptive. The second Y axis actually shows the percentage decreasing from 0.5% of cases seen to 0.15% cases seen. So, a rare thing got…more rare. Additionally, all the numbers are reported as a percentage, so there is no information at all about just how many total cases we are looking at. The total group seen has to be at least 200 people/year, since otherwise the percentages indicate sexually active headless torsos. But we really have no idea if this is any sort of a representative sample of the general population.
There is a much larger issue with this study, however. They have no data on what the waxing rate is in either the population of women showing up in their clinic, or the population at large. None. All they have is anecdotal stories that waxing became more popular during that time period. So, they aren’t even able to show a correlation; they just speculated that there would be a correlation, if there was any data.
There is a certain logical beauty in linking the destruction of Ho-Ha forests by clear-cutting and the death of the native fauna. (A crab louse paper from 1983 describes them as “swinging from hair to hair” rather like monkeys, BTW.) However, there simply is no evidence for for a link between snatch waxing and pubic lice decline.
Honestly? I think the only reason this paper made it past the journal editors was because it was about pubic lice, and crotch crickets are inherently interesting because of the pastures they graze in. (Which, of course, is exactly why -I- am writing about them!)
I did some investigating (in the library, pervs!) and found that there is actually data available on happy trail hair removal for women in the US and Australia. The percentage of Australian college women who shaved their pudenda was around 48% during the same time period; but that means that the majority of women still had some or all of their original carpeting, whether or not it still matched the drapes.
We also know from a very detailed study of American women in 2010 that there is no dominant pattern to hair removal in the US. Women aged 18-24 were most likely of all age groups to have naked crotches, but even then only 38% of them were hair free down there. Having a hairless muffin was actually the least common pattern of body hair in the over 2,450 women studied. Additionally, removal of one’s No-No Fro was NOT related to having experienced an STD infection in that study–which strongly suggests that the sample used for the “Brazilian hypothesis” was not representative.
It is far too soon to say if pubic lice are an endangered species. I know that when I was teaching entomology regularly, at least one student a year would manage to collect a crab louse, so they are still out there.
As for me, I plan to keep my Map of Tasmania intact. Hope that wasn’t overly sharing.
EDITED TO ADD NOTE: a 2013 update, since there is another press release out about pubic lice. Still not time to list pubic lice as an endangered species, folks. The majority of the world still has intact shrubbery.
All hail the internet, which has once again delivered something strange and wonderful to my virtual doorstep:
Ant Egg Oil Cream.
It is, as best I can tell, a traditional hair removal remedy from the middle east–Iran and Turkey, specifically.
You get all the common pitches in the marketing playbook:
“Tala Ant Egg Oil effect was proven in laboratory experiments with doctors. “
Of course, what exactly the doctors were actually experimenting with or about, who knows. My experiment on human subjects with this product produced a nearly 100% response rate of “WTF.” And I just showed them a picture.
We also can be sure it’s safe, because it’s:
You are also warned to beware of substitutes:
“There are lots of fake ant egg oil products so you should buy original Tala Ant Egg Oil.”
Also, this is probably my most favoritest FAQ on the internet:
Q: Is this ant egg oil smell like ant ?A: No. It doesn’t smell like ant.
Here is the thing that is marketing genius. The way this stuff works? You remove all your hair FIRST. Then you put the ant egg oil on and massage it in for about 10 minutes. So, basically:
1. Shave or wax all your hair off
2. Apply Ant Egg Oil
3. Excelsior! Enjoy not having hair!
Part of the marketing pitch is that it is safe for babies. In fact, putting it on babies specifically to prevent growth of hair is part of how this product is promoted. Which, I suppose, is quite effective for about 14 years.
Lest you think that I am just making fun of an internet site put up by someone whose first language is clearly not English, I want to point out this much more upscale version, that pretty much repeats all the same marketing lines, with the same lack of evidence. Although they use numbers and percentages to make it look even more sciencey!
The breakthrough GUTTO Ant Egg Oil Cream reduces the amount of hair in the applied area by 65%, delays the re-growth by 75% and weakens by 46%. It is a completely natural product found as a result of scientific and dermatological tests.
It’s fascinating that on the same page where this company claims scientific testing found the product, they also use an Appeal to Antiquity/Argumentum ad Populum by telling us this stuff is derived from “widespread traditional usage of ant egg oil of Ottoman women.”
What I really want to know, but can’t find anywhere, is information on the manufacturing. What kind of ant eggs? And how do they get the eggs???
If, indeed, their claim that a protein in the ant eggs destroys the root of the hair is true, you are going to need a LOT of ant eggs in order to have enough to sell in creams. Also, in general, my experience is that ants can get quite cranky about you taking their eggs.
Inquiring minds want to know. If anyone happens to find more info, please send it along.