OMG Terrorist Cheese!

Those bastards! Now it’s not safe to fly with cheese!

“The seizures at airports in San Diego, Milwaukee, Houston and Baltimore included “wires, switches, pipes or tubes, cell phone components and dense clay-like substances,” including block cheese….The bulletin said block cheese has a consistency similar to some explosives.”

Now, as someone who frequently is a messy packer, and additionally a cheap bastard, I frequently find myself flying with a mixture of cheese, crackers, Ethernet cords, and power cords all tangled up in my suitcase, along with an occasional battery charger. If I am picked up on my way to the Entomological Society Meeting in December, I will definitely let you all know. In fact, I think I’m going to bring EXTRA cheese, just to mess with them.

If I end up on the Homeland Security Cheese Watchlist, so be it. (Please note this is a separate threat from the Pizza Cheese plots reported earlier.)

The amazing part is this:

“There is no credible, specific threat here,” TSA spokeswoman Ellen Howe said Tuesday.”

Gosh, you think maybe they are trying to distract the public from some of the other things going on in the news right now? Maybe?

5 thoughts on “OMG Terrorist Cheese!

  1. Just tell ’em you’re doing APHIS sampling for Piophilidae (cheese skipper flies)!

    Ye gods and little fishes … at this rate, in three years we’ll be flying after changing into paper booties and examination gowns (at least the surgical masks will cut down on the number of airborne pathogens).

    Remember the good ol’ days when the flight attendants brought you full meals with dishes and cutlery? I still have some of the TWA booklets they gave out to children, describing the exciting functioning of the passenger jets and the rewarding careers awaiting me in aviation. (Of course, being female that would have been a stewardess job, to which end I was also given a souvenir metal “flight wings” pin.)

    As for distractors, hell yeah. Why else would the news be full of fluff stories about celebrities who are famous for merely being famous, rather than about ways to reduce carbon footprints or other critical concerns?

    “The smart way to keep people passive and obedient is to strictly limit the spectrum of acceptable opinion, but allow very lively debate within that spectrum – even encourage the more critical and dissident views. That gives people the sense that there’s free thinking going on, while all the time the presuppositions of the system are being reinforced by the limits put on the range of the debate.”
    ~Noam Chomsky

  2. “…The bulletin said block cheese has a consistency similar to some explosives.”

    Hmm, and often works like explosives on me, but then I’m lactose intolerant ;-) Hey, who moved my exploding cheese?!

  3. For about the last year I’ve been learning to make my own cheese. Suddenly I feel like my kitchen has been transformed into a bomb factory.

    Today’s message from Homeland Security: pay no attention to the man behind the curtain

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