Things have been a little heavy here lately, so I give you: The Church of the Dude.
From Duderonomy, Book 1, V. 5:
“When discussing a matter of grave importance, or even of trifling idiocy, always make sure to employ expletives as much as possible to prove your heartfelt honesty and conviction. To ensure your dudeness, all out-of-control, manic discussions should be followed with entreaties to “just take it easy, man.”
Amazingly, I seem to already be on the path to dudeism. Perhaps I should seek ordination.
In other amusing news, I was in the bank this morning, listening to a dad try to explain money to a 3 year old:
Kid: “What’s that?”
Dad: “It’s money.”
Kid: “No it isn’t! It’s paper!” (giggles)
Dad: “Yes it is. See? Look, it has numbers on it. This is a 10 dollar bill.”
Kid: (tone of scorn) “That’s not money. Money is metal! Silly Daddy.”
Dad: “See, paper money is used just like metal money. It’s a symbol of how we exchange…..”
Kid: (runs away shrieking) “Shiny!”