I was cleaning my office last night, and found a newsletter from my graduate department in 1987!   I had to share. Lyrics by Jim Richmond; hopefully he doesn’t mind me sharing them here.

Sung to the tune of the Christmas Song (Chestnuts roasting on an open fire)

Professors resting wherever they are,
Grad students nipping at their knows
Post-docs with their eyes on jobs aglow
And secretaries dressed up like who knows;

Everybody knows some plants and some insects too,
Goes to make the work just right,
Tiny technicians with their eyes half aglow
will find it hard celebrating tonight.

We know the Chairman is on his way,
He has lots of authority in his say,
And every PI is sure to try
To see if the Dean can make their proposal fly.

And so to you I am offering this simple phrase,
For you, whatever age you are,
Though it’s been said many times many days,
Merry Christmas to you.

Posted by Gwen Pearson

Writer. Nerd. Insect Evangelist. Have you heard the good news? BUGS!


  1. That last bit doesn’t quite rhyme, but I like it anyway!

  2. Love it!
    And you (& Jim) inspired me — because I wanted to do *something* with today’s news out of NCSU. Happy holidays! :-)

    Parcoblatta lata Wonderland
    (to the tune of “Winter Wonderland”)

    Roaches stink, are you smellin’?
    Pheromones, they’re a-tellin’.
    So succulent-sweet, what woodpeckers eat.
    Parcoblatta lata wonderland.

    Dr. Schal took a reading.
    Found the compounds for breeding
    By using some gas as roaches chased ass.
    Parcoblatta lata wonderland.

    Nuclear magnetic resonating
    Let him know what turned a suitor on.
    Then he synthesized a mix for baiting
    And watched the males all falling for the con.

    Now his sexy solution
    Tells about evolution:
    Viagra for some, for others it’s dumb.
    Parcoblatta lata wonderland.


    People say the lata’s a home-wrecker,
    But the bugs are happy in the wood,
    ‘Til they’re chomped by red-cockaded pecker
    Who wants a lata latte in the ‘hood.

    Synthesized, it’s a winner.
    “Go get laid, then be dinner!”
    That pheromone blend helps avian friend.
    Parcoblatta lata wonderland.
    Parcoblatta lata wonderland.

    “Cockroach Hookup Signal Could Benefit Endangered Wildlife”
    NCSU Newsroom

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